Tomorrow I will be 15 weeks and am feeling quite relieved to have made it this far. My first trimester was full of worry, freak outs, and an almost constant fear this would end horribly. Fears that were only fueled by my constant over analyzing of what my body was and wasn't doing.
Feb 7th, Super Bowl Sunday we were at my sisters house. I was convinced I was cramping and nervous the whole night, but said nothing because I didn't want to worry Joe. The next day before going to take my progesterone I saw some light pink mucus when I wiped. Later that night, there were a few spots on my pad. I freaked, called for Joe and after 15 minutes of debate we were off to the ER. Sitting there for hours in the waiting room was painful and scary. We barely spoke so afraid to set the other one off. I felt like a failure thinking my body had failed us once again. Finally after almost 5 hours of just waiting we got back to see the doctor. He did a pelvic exam and said my cervix was closed and there was no blood to be seen. I felt like I could finally breathe again. They did an ultrasound and blood work as well. The u/s showed the yolk sac measuring 5 weeks, which was right on since I was only 5 weeks and 1 day at this point (even though I thought I was 5 weeks and 4 days). My Hcg was also high 12,267. The doc told me my urine showed that I had an infection and to take it easy for a few days, no lifting, no sex, etc. He said that a UTI can cause mild cramps and some spotting so not to worry. We went home relieved and hopeful once again.
Friday Feb. 12th was my first official OB appt. The appt wasn't until late in the afternoon and I swear that day could not have gone by any slower. But finally we were there in the waiting room, me feeling like a moron because I forgot I needed to give a urine sample and I peed right before I left for the appt. When the nurse called us back I thought I might throw up, but the appt went by quickly and painlessly. The u/s showed a perfect little heartbeat and revealed that I was wrong on my ovulation date, changing my due date from 10/7/10 to 10/10/10. I cried when I saw that little flickering on the screen and didn't want the doc to end the u/s. He printed us out a pic and we decided after dinner we were going to tell his parents.
We stopped at Hallmark and got a picture frame that said Grandchild and put a copy of the u/s pic in it. His parents were surprised to see us, but even more so when we handed them their gift. Dad couldn't stop hugging me and I could tell he was crying a little. It was a great family moment and I can't wait to tell our Lil Pumpkin how much he/she was loved from the moment of creation by not just us, but the entire family.
Two weeks later on March 3rd was my 2nd appt where we got to see the baby again and it's lil heartbeat for the 2nd time. The doc was able to do an abdominal u/s so that was a plus even though we didn't get a pic cuz it was too blurry. At this point the doc said I would start having my appts every 4 weeks since things were going good.
However, with all these positive things my inner worry wort came out again on March 26. Around 1pm I went to the bathroom and was convinced there was pink on my pantie liner and when I wiped. I immediately called Joe freaking out and he was on his way to meet me. I then called the doc and they told me to come in right away. After an agonizing 30 min wait, the doc did an exam and u/s. My cervix was still closed and he saw no blood. The u/s was amazing. The baby had grown so much in just a few weeks. Our Lil Pumpkin was moving around, waving arms, and kicking legs with a strong heartbeat. The doc said more than likely the little bit of blood was from the progesterone suppositories irritating my skin and it had caused some cracking. So he told me to apply cortisone cream a few times a day and voila, problem solved. He told me he was glad I came in instead of stressing out about it until my next appt, but I still felt a bit stupid.
Every Sunday was another triumph as I got close and closer to that 12 week mark and finally on March 28th I was there, but instead of being super excited I had a new worry. I was done with the progesterone and scared something would go wrong. Thankfully nothing has happened and it has now been almost 3 weeks since I stopped taking it. I must say it is nice not having to do it twice a day and now I can sleep on my side when I first go to bed, so that is a definite plus.
My last OB appt was on April 5th. The doc finally used the Doppler and we were able to hear the heartbeat instead of just seeing it. That was the most beautiful sound in the world. The HB was strong at 140 plus our Lil Pumpkin decided then was a good time to start using my uterus as a trampoline. It took the tech about 4 times before they could actually measure the beats. She got the HB right away but then the baby would move and she would have to try again. Just another sign this baby is a fighter.
Since then, the worry has been making its appearance less and less. I have tried to stop analyzing every little thing my body does or doesn't do. I have finally been able to tell all my friends and extended family about the baby and started a registry with a few things. I can't wait until I feel our Lil Pumpkin move and to find out the gender, cuz then that small registry will become filled with clothes and toys and so much more.